How do we become ourselves?

(and not who our parents, principals, preachers, or presidents tell us to be?)   

The 18th century Rabbi Zusya of Anapoli, said he feared that when he died, the angels would ask not “Why weren’t you more like Moses?” but “Why weren’t you more like Zusya?”    

Contemporary Quaker educator, Parker Palmer, gives this advice:

“Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it,
I must listen to my life telling me who I am.”

I listened. 

“Teach!” said my life.

“Not just Faith. Philosophy!”

“Okay!” I said. And went about preparing myself.

I trained with Professor Matthew Lipman, the founder of Philosophy for Children, inspired by his belief that young people could think critically, carefully, and creatively, and make reasonable judgments about what to do or believe.

Life responded. A synagogue’s religious school director agreed (after some persuasion) to let me teach ethics to 4th graders — as long as I taught Hebrew, too. It was a deal that lasted three years with the same class. I taught Judaism and Identity — yet we also learned Inquiry and Integrity.

Still, I hadn’t fulfilled my promise. I wondered how, with Interfaith marriage on the rise, I could prepare my students (and my own children — products of a Jewish-Christian union) for a world that is looking quite different from the one I inherited. What did they need to know to survive and thrive in an increasingly multi-faith society?

“Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it,
I must listen to my life, telling me who I am.”

I listened some more…. 

“Teach!” said my life.

“Not just One Faith. All faiths!”

And so I trained with Rabbi Joseph Gelberman at All Faiths Seminary in New York, inspired by his motto, “Never ‘instead of’… always ‘in addition to’.” And became an interfaith minister.

Life responded again. I founded Jewbilation, a Jewish-Interfaith program for religiously unaffiliated families. It was a deal that lasted 15 years with the same group. I taught children to connect with their Jewish roots AND the rich heritage within all the world’s great religious traditions.

We studied the stories of the Torah AND the parables of the New Testament.

We practiced Jewish holidays AND learned their relationship to the holidays of other faiths.

We visited synagogues, churches, mosques, AND temples.

We watched movies, like Fiddler on the Roof AND Whale Rider, and saw Tevya (the Jewish peddler) and Koro (the Maori chief) confront the same, ever-familiar, perennial problem:  How to maintain one’s traditions in the face of great and rapid societal change? 

For their Interfaith Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, my students chanted in Hebrew AND shared a Native American blessing. Or a Mennonite song. Or a Buddhist prayer. 

The interfaith couples I married stood under the wedding chuppah AND lit Unity Candles. Or exchanged the Arras coins, a Latin tradition. Or did Saptapadi, the Hindu marriage rite, around the fire.

But…

As inter-religious conflict spread across the globe, being familiar with other faiths was not enough. How could my students connect with the people who practiced them?

“I must listen to my life telling me who I am.” 

I listened again…

“Teach!,” said my life.

“Not just All Faiths. Interfaith!”*

So, I introduced my students to inspired people living sacred lives, people I met at interfaith events sponsored by our local interfaith organization. (I even joined the board and designed some of the interfaith programs they offer.)

My friend, Jaspreet, welcomed my students to the Gurdwara,* where his class applied the teachings of the Guru Granth Sahib to their lives, and shared langar* with us. We drove home that wintery night, our minds-bellies-hearts full, enamored with the Sikh religion.

At Chinmaya Mission, Sharada and her staff welcomed my students in a school-wide assembly and included them in a middle school class on Hindu culture. My students recognized concepts they learned studying Jewish Mussar. In the prakrti and vikrti * of Hinduism, they saw the yetzer ha-tov and yetzer ha-ra of* Judaism. They saw themselves in the Other. And they left beaming, holding prasad* in their hands and heart.

My colleague Ernestine, a Unity Minister, and I co-hosted an Interfaith Passover where our students experienced the Seder rituals through two worldviews. When the Twelve Powers of New Thought and the Ten Sefirot* of Kabbalah (Jewish mystical tradition) overlapped, our students lit up.

Technology also allowed my students to “do interfaith” on a global scale. They video-conferenced LIVE with peers at a Muslim School in Jakarta, and blogged with Hindu peers at a boarding school in India. They all shared experiences and ideas about faith, identity, and community.

BUT…

As globalization encroaches on all of our markers of identity, our young people need a deeper, wider foundation story about humanity. Who are we, really? Why are we here? How can we live together in a multi-faith, multi-cultural world? Can we find ways to include our religious traditions while transcending an ethnocentric worldview? Can we evolve a shared global culture?

Again, I listened.

“Teach!,” said my life.

“Not just Interfaith. InterSpirituality!”*

Life responded with more inspiration. Like the rabbis of old, who re-designed Hanukkah to halt a dangerous nationalist trend by emphasizing a miracle of light over a military victory, I suggest that we all re-cast our holidays to make way for a Common-Unity, a non-dualism, out of which individual differences can be celebrated.

As my practice evolves, I continually find new ways to include both roots and reason. Life responds with inspired resources, moments of recognition, and experiences of reunion in my teaching.

I’m not always certain my teachings hit the mark of what I aim for, but I am certain of this: 

When there’s no life left to listen to, I will know how to answer the angels who greet me.

I will have been myself.

I will have been just like Lauren. 

“Before we tell our lives what to do,
we must listen to our Lives telling us who we are.”

And let us say, “Thank You, Life, for inviting us to listen.

I encourage you to explore educational and experiential resources from ZinnHouse.

GLOSSARY

Interfaith Dialogue is a term used interchangeably with Interreligious Dialogue, but tends to emphasize the sharing of the specific faith dimensions, inner motivations, spiritual practices, ritual expressions, and personal religious experiences across traditions. It also highlights the search for a common basis of spiritual experience and faith among all people. (from Beverly Lanzetta at beverlylanzetta.net)

Chuppah = Jewish wedding canopy

Gurdwara (Punjabi: ਗੁਰਦੁਆਰਾ, Gurduārā or ਗੁਰਦਵਾਰਾ, Gurdwārā; meaning “door to the Guru”) is the place of worship for Sikhs; however, people from all faiths, and those who do not profess any faith, are welcomed in the Sikh Gurdwara.

Langar (Punjabi: ਲੰਗਰ, Hindi: लंगर) is the term used in the Sikh religion for the common kitchen/canteen where food is served in a Gurdwara to all the visitors (without distinction of background) for free.

Yetzer ha-tov and Yetzer ha-ra = In Jewish religious thought, every human being has two inclinations or instincts, one pulling upwards, the other downwards. These are the ‘good inclination’—yetzer ha-tov—and the ‘evil inclination’—yetzer ha-ra.

Prakrti and Vikrti  =  Prakriti is our elemental nature and Vikriti is the imbalance that results when we are not living in harmony with that nature.

Prasad (Hindustani pronunciation: [prəsaːd̪]; also called prasada or prasadam) is a material substance of food that is a religious offering in both Hinduism and Sikhism. It is normally consumed by worshippers.

Ten Sefirot = The Jewish mystical doctrine known as “Kabbalah” (=”Tradition”) is distinguished by its theory of ten creative forces that intervene between the infinite, unknowable God (“Ein Sof”) and our created world.

Interspiritual is a term coined by Wayne Teasdale to express the assimilation of insights, values, and spiritual practices from the various religions and their application to one’s own inner life and development. Further, the prefix inter in “interspirituality” expresses the ontological roots that tie the various traditions together and the essential interdependence of the religions. (from beverlylanzetta.net)